But if you can admit it, they’re kind of accurate.
Dating at any age is bound to have its own set of challenges, right? Right? Okay, if you didn’t say right then you’re one of those lucky individuals blessed with a ton of charm and little to no shame, while the rest of us are out here trying not to stumble over our words or watching what we say for one reason or another. But the truth about dating is that’s essentially like high school, you’re attempting to make the other person feel that you’re worth their time by proving that you can be popular and therefore capable of providing a good time or a good conversation, or both. Some folks can do this without any effort at all, and it’s infuriating to those of us that can’t, sometimes. But then we get to those of us that are either severe introverts or simply lock up when it comes time to speak to the person we’re attracted to. That’s a fun moment, isn’t it? You walk up to the person you want to speak to, or you shuffle your way up there, perhaps experiencing a false start or two, but finally, you get there. And what happens?
Well, that’s kind of hard to say since some people feel the pressure and fold like a wet piece of paper, while others find that they focus and narrow their field of thought sufficiently to shoot their shot with every intention of making it work. Hey, you miss every shot you don’t take remember? Whether you’re denied or the other person becomes confused and can’t speak, stuff happens. But staying confident and trying to make sure that the other person has every reason to like you and no reason to laugh at you or spurn you or do anything else is kind of important, at least to your ego. If you feel like you’re going to die when someone rejects you then you’ve got deeper problems and I might have to write a series of articles on that. But for now, if you shoot your shot and find yourself being rejected, oh well. That guy or girl, or that non-binary, or that attack helicopter, however, y’all define yourselves these days, wasn’t the only one on the market, and there are plenty of other individuals out there willing to at least talk to you to figure out if you’re worth their time or not.
As to whether you really are worth their time, well, that’s kind of up to you. Confidence can take you a long way when it comes to believing in yourself, and so can soap and toothpaste. Yes, you do need to keep yourself clean to attract another person, since most folks do care about hygiene and don’t want to be able to smell you coming. That also means don’t bathe in cologne or perfume since a little of that crap goes a long way, while a whole bottle of it can fumigate a single-family home for weeks. In other words, be confident, be clean, and above all, be courteous, especially when you first meet a person. Dating memes aren’t always on point, but when they are, they’re funny as hell since they get you thinking about this stuff, and how some folks still, somehow, don’t get it.
It’s funny to think of how many people out there can’t just approach a person and start to talk, but get them on Tinder and they’re bound to act like they’re impervious to embarrassment and shame. Of course, some folks get on Tinder and have an emotional breakdown either because they don’t have any matches, or because they can’t find any ‘good’ matches when the truth is that the problem isn’t with their selections, it’s with their ridiculously high standards. People have come to expect way too much from technology since like it or not, an app can match you with other people based on what you plug into the fields that are provided for your dating info, but you kind of have to be HONEST when you’re describing yourself, and what you’re looking for. Telling the world what you think you look is all well and good, but an app is going to take all of that into consideration and do the job it’s been given, while people with functional eyesight are going to make up their own damn minds when looking at someone who claims to resemble a supermodel when they look like something out of a horror movie. Okay, maybe that’s not as kind as it needs to be…but it’s honest at least.
Don’t settle, no matter who you are.
It’s funny, but some people can’t figure out how to win on Tinder. Here’s a tip, take your phone, turn it off, and GO TALK TO PEOPLE. Sure, it’s more random and less likely to give as many hits as you want on an average basis, but the point is to get out and actually talk to people. Anyone can put up a series of images and add a bit of text to it. Hell, I could write out a life story that would make a lot of women swoon and possibly be ready to head on over simply based on the accomplishments, at least until they did a background check. But getting out and meeting people without Tinder or any other app is usually your best bet when it comes to gauging who a person is and what they might have to offer. If you’re trying to do that on an app then you’re going in with a ton of trust, blinders, and no common sense. Granted, it’s easy to dip if you see your Tinder date and decide it’s not the right moment. But getting out and meeting people in person is a quicker and more efficient way to tell who you’re going to get along with, and whether or not you need to dip that moment, rather than waste your time getting to the meeting place and dipping then. I know, it’s old-fashioned, but some of the old practices are still preferable.
A sense of humor goes a long way.
People love the fact that others have a sense of humor, especially if your humor vibes with another person’s. It’s not a guaranteed way to get laid or even get a second date, but it’s better to make the person laugh, in a friendly way, than to see their face scrunch up in disgust or hatred. If you can tell a few jokes or personal anecdotes then you’re ahead of the game.
Sometimes it’s not meant to be, sometimes it is.
Hey, if a person ghosts you then it wasn’t meant to be, but if every person ghosts you, then maybe you need to adjust something about your character. No joke, it might not be them, it might be something that they see in you. One thing about online dating is that no matter if you see enough pictures to fill a book, the fact that there are filters and all sorts of things to alter pictures with means that you might be selling goods you don’t have, and people are definitely going to ghost you for that kind of stuff unless you happen to be a genuine surprise that they enjoy.
The dreaded friend zone is a killer.
One thing to remember, especially for guys, is that women don’t owe you a damned thing even if you’re nice and can prove it. If they friend zone you then either move on or accept another friend and keep looking. Ladies, the same goes for you, since sometimes it takes more than a friendly jiggle and a smile to nab a guy.
Oh yes, the expectations.
I mean, this pic kind of says a lot, and no matter what, you can accept what you see as gospel or laugh it off and enjoy the hilarity of it. But screw you anyway society.
People will try to ‘help’.
If this has ever happened to you then I’m sorry. If not, then you’re damned lucky. But one thing you should think about is that your friends and family are trying to help, in their own dysfunctional way.
Dating is a gamble any way you cut it.
Seriously, you’re going to deal with this if you’re online or if you’re in person. The best part about talking to people face to face is you can get a lot better idea of whether they’re a little too weird for you right then and there. It pays to have an alarm on your phone so you can tackle an ’emergency’ if it happens to come up.
Yes, communication is still a big thing.
Given how much people text and use apps, this is tragically very real. Seriously, your phone does come with the talking function…it’s a telephone, not JUST a texting device.
Expectations vs. reality when it comes to dating.
All you ‘fire’ meme-lords out there, just remember this, you can make a woman laugh, but that doesn’t mean her lips are going to be parting for any other reason unless you’re worth their time. Comprende?
WTR? (Why’s That Radass?)
Dating has almost always been one of the most difficult things for any person, especially since it means opening up and letting someone else into your weird little world. But while searching for the right someone is a tough and arduous process, finding that special someone makes it worth it. But good lord people, close the apps and get out and meet others. At least then you know who you’re talking to…kind of.