There are ways to get a woman without being a total jerk…true story.
Some guys would admit that they have a real issue when it comes to attracting/talking to/approaching women, while other guys believe that they’re a regular Casanova. The truth is that a lot of guys do have a serious issue when it comes to discovering how to attract a woman in one way or another. Some try too hard, some don’t try hard enough, and then again, some simply don’t know what to say when they’re near a woman. This is enough to cause a guy a serious amount of anxiety, right? Don’t feel too bad about it guys, women aren’t always as easy to figure out as we’d like them to be, but then again, there are times when they’re dropping hints that we really need to pay attention to.
Of course, too many guys end up thinking that ‘dropping hints’ means that women are seeking to enter a relationship and might want to pressure us into changing before we’re ready. Some guys might even take this as a sign that women want to trap them in a relationship that they’re not quite ready to take on. Let’s face it guys, no matter how we look at it, there are a lot of us that are ready to step into something, but we don’t know what it is that we want just yet. Those who don’t want to admit it are deluding themselves, while those who are at least willing to consider it might see what they want to see and not much else. Let’s be real and admit it, trying to woo your new girlfriend isn’t the easiest thing in the world to do, especially when we don’t always manage to interpret the signals we get in the most efficient manner.
It could be that guys don’t pay attention to anything other than what we can see, since honestly, physical attraction is kind of a distraction sometimes. It’s meant to be, kind of, since as much as men try to impress women, the ladies are attempting to impress us, as well as each other, with the primping and the looks they choose for themselves. It’s tough guys, there’s no doubt about it, but attracting a woman shouldn’t be a case of figuring out how to complete an impossible mission, it should be something that comes naturally because you’re ready to have fun seeing what different women like, and how you can make that work for the both of you. There are dozens of analogies that people enjoy using when it comes to picking up women, but one of the most fundamental aspects of dating that anyone, man or woman, should feel the need to remember is that while attraction plays a big role in this process, it’s more of a catalyst that allows people to find out if they really mesh in a meaningful way, or if they’re better off finding someone else.
I know, it gets confusing, and we don’t all get it right the first time.
There are ways to get past the initial rejection.
A lot of women do want men to be assertive and even dominant, while some want to assert their own level of dominance in the relationship. But when getting together initially, there is a limit to what women want to see. Some will test you and some will make it appear as though they’re not into the dominant male attitude. But there are several things to remember when it comes to being ‘The Man’ in the relationship from the get-go. Here are just a couple you might want to consider and think about when approaching a woman.
- Don’t come on too strong: Honestly, a lot of women want a strong man, but strength can be measured in a lot of different ways, meaning that not every woman is looking for a musclebound hulk that can crush a soda can between two fingers. Real strength isn’t just in the muscles that are developed by a gym rat, it’s in the strength of character that a man can bring to a relationship, the mental, emotional, and psychological strength that far too many people talk about but don’t think that much about at times. In other words, women do want men that have their shit together on the inside as well as the outside. Depending on the woman you’re trying to woo, she might not care about your muscles or your finances as much as she cares about whether or not you’re a sensitive, well-put-together individual who can be entirely masculine, but also attentive to the feelings of others. When I say don’t come on too strong, it means to treat a woman like you would anyone else, with the respect that’s due to a stranger upon first meeting them. Talk to them, be kind, and make it clear that you’re not there to be dominant, you’re just there to express your interest.
- Do not, and I mean DO NOT, let the conversation focus solely on YOU: If the woman you’re trying to talk to asks for your information and more about you, that’s fine. She probably doesn’t want your life story broken down into two sentences, but it’s just as likely that she wants to know enough about you to determine whether she wants to keep talking. If she’s into what she hears then she’ll probably ask you to keep talking, or she’ll seek to steer the conversation in a way that will get you to open up a bit. if not, then she might shut you down with short, brief answers to your questions that lead to nowhere. But if you start out talking about yourself and nothing else, then you’re bound to ruin the moment and give her the impression that you don’t really give a damn about anyone else’s opinion unless it has something to do with you. Listen to the woman, encourage her to talk about what’s important to her, or at least what she likes and what she might want to share with you at that moment. Leave your ego out of it and just listen, and respond honestly.
Women do want you to listen, believe that, and they will talk a little to a lot more when it comes to realizing that a man is willing to be genuine in his interest.
Dig a little deeper and find that person your parents did their best to raise.
I know, it sounds kind of hokey since it’s almost like saying “What would your mama say?” when talking about how you’ve grown up and how you react to the world around you. But the truth is that women do react far better to men that are willing to make them think about the possibilities.
3. Dig deep for that thoughtful side: Not every woman out there is looking for the muscular stud that can give her the night of her life. I mean, sure, a lot of women do fantasize about this, just as men fantasize about dating a bikini model with a waist that could hula hoop through a cheerio. But the reality kind of trumps the fantasy a lot of times since women do happen to like men which will make them think and possibly challenge them in more than one way. I can attest to this since being challenged by another person isn’t always the best time, but being challenged by someone that’s attempting to get you to think and to become a better person is intriguing, not to mention enticing. If someone can make you think by being thoughtful and honest, then you might have found someone willing to prove that they’re your intellectual match, as well as your physical match. Trust me on this, that’s not something that many people can find that easily.
4. Manners maketh man, remember that phrase: Women do like men that have manners, whether you want to think that’s lame or not. It doesn’t mean that you have to act like a prim and proper gentleman at every turn, but opening a door now and then, showing them that you know how to treat a lady to make them feel special, that’s worth something. It’s very true that a lot of us fall into bad habits after a while, either because we’re single for too long and turn feral (or close to it) or because we’ve been with someone too long and consider them just another fixture in our lives. But the fact is that our manners say a lot about us, and how we view other people. In the beginning, a man might be all manners and courteous gestures, but retaining as much of that as you can is important since whether people want to admit it or not, treating each other with kindness and decency isn’t that difficult.
A lot of women watch men carefully to see how they treat others.
Women are watching, there’s no doubt about that, but they’re doing more than licking their lips thinking of what a man would be like in bed or if he could support her. A lot of women are trying to see a few miles down that relationship road to determine whether or not they made the wise decision, or if they might need to make a detour at some point.
5. How you treat others, especially those close to you, will tell a woman quite a bit: How do you treat your parents? How do you interact with your relatives, your friends, or those who know you? Are you the jerk in their lives that they love anyway, or the guy that is secure enough to love and cherish those who do the same to you? Women see this stuff, guys, and they’ll either judge you by what they see, or they’ll hold in reserve any feelings that they have concerning what they think will happen to them. If you treat your family and friends well and are the type of guy that can be ‘the man’ and still show everyone that they mean something to you, it goes a long way toward showing a woman that she’ll be just as valuable to you. When moving into a relationship, this is way more important than a lot of people appear to think sometimes.
6. Dialing down your masculinity and letting the world affect you isn’t weakness, especially when it means letting people in Too many men still think that showing any kind of emotion is weak, that it will make them somehow lesser for the experience. But the truth is that allowing the world in is a choice. Showing vulnerability doesn’t mean rolling over and exposing your belly so that someone can come along and rip your heart out through your intestines. Nope, being vulnerable means that you’re willing to let someone in and expose your soft emotional parts to the people who care about you the most. You can throw up emotional walls and blockades to the world around you to stay safe, but the people who mean the most should be able to move past those with ease. Women do like knowing that they don’t have to batter down a wall or navigate tricky emotional terrain when getting to know you better, as it means that, to them, you’re willing to show trust and everything they’d like to see.
Trust me on this one, you’re no less of a man for lowering your walls from time to time.
The power of laughter is hugely underrated sometimes.
At this stage in the relationship you’ve likely figured out how to attract, keep, and satisfy your partner to a certain degree. Anyone thinking that they’re completely safe in their relationship might want to check themselves just a little by remembering that things can still happen and that keeping this bond strong is still priority. There are a few ways to make this happen, but here are just a couple.
7. Being educated can go a long way when it comes to relationships: You don’t have to be a genius at all times and you don’t need to have a wall full of degrees to impress a woman. Those pieces of paper are bound to impress them a little bit at least, but your application of that knowledge and, get this, the idea that you know something but not everything, goes a lot further than if you decide to prove that you’re the smartest person in the room at any given moment. Wisdom, guys, that’s what can attract a woman far more than intelligence can since wisdom is the collected intelligence and experience that has taught the average person how to relate to others and value the ability to be a great thinker and also a great listener. You’ve likely heard people mention what the ‘wise man’ would say, but I’m here to tell you that your level of education, both in life and in the classroom, can combine to make you a far more desirable individual to many women.
8. Make her laugh, trust me: If you can make a woman laugh, then you’ve done something extraordinary, so long as she’s laughing in a positive manner that’s meant to be inviting. If she’s laughing at you in a negative manner then, well, you might have messed up somehow. But if you can make a woman laugh at something you’ve said, or did, or just make her laugh in the best way, then you’ve succeeded on a level that should keep you emotionally secure for a long time to come. Seriously guys, a woman laughing with you, or at something you’ve said, with real emotion, is one of the greatest sounds in the world.
A funny and intelligent man can go a long way when it comes to attracting the woman they want.
Keep life interesting. That’s it, just keep it interesting.
It sounds easy, doesn’t it? That’s the downside, it only SOUNDS easy, but if you’re diligent and can keep things moving along in a manner that women enjoy, then you’ll find it gets a bit easier with the right woman.
9. Give her an adventure: I don’t mean take her on a trip around the world unless you can finance that kind of thing and have all the time you need. But if you’re bound by a budget and can’t go anywhere and everywhere at any given time, then simply find a way to wow her from time to time by being adventurous with her in one way or another. Some might think that this takes too much money, too much time and that they can’t possibly keep up with it. But the trick is this: you make your own adventure. I know, it’s vague, but it’s also very personal for each couple and is meant to draw you closer together and keep you that way. The day you stop being adventurous is usually the day you admit that the fire has either burned out or has burned low to the point of comfort that every moment with your significant other is an adventure. I know, it’s corny, but it’s also very true at times.
10. Show her that you know how to keep life interesting: Be adaptable, be cunning, but resourceful, and above all, make sure that she knows you’re willing to change, to evolve, and to do this with them. A woman who makes you change or tries to change you against your will is something you need to guard against in the beginning, as this is a giant red flag that you should be able to avoid. But someone who makes you want to show that you can change, that you can find new ways to be interesting and entertaining, is someone that will benefit you for a lifetime in many wonderful ways.
I know, it’s all a bit sappy for our site, but it’s true guys. Find someone that will challenge you to be the best person you can be.
WTR? (Why’s That Radass?)
We’re always here to have fun and joke around with stuff. But we’re also here to look after our subscribers and give them any tips and hints they might want or need. When meeting the woman of your dreams, or the woman that you didn’t know you wanted, the goal is to make sure that you know how to react and how to hold her close without losing her. Here’s to you fellas, take the tips and do with them what you will.